03/06/09

South Street Sushi

by mefman00

South Street Sushi is a mirage, a hallucination, an eruption of passion lined thinly with a nightmarish hue. Like a tribal rite of passage, its essence cannot exist outside of the hours of 2:00 am - 4:00 am, as if a greasy, grungy Brigadoon bloomed and blossomed from the bitter sidewalks of South Street every night.

To attain this level of enlightenment, the subject must consume enough alcohol that they would be considered a "crying out for help" by certain audiences. Next, after a confused, sometimes frightening trek through the shadowy South Philly streets, the subject must obtain one cheesesteak from Jim's Steaks, at 4th and South streets. The cheesesteak is carefully transported to Lorenzo's, one block east, and kept in its wrapping while the subject purchases any one slice of Lorenzo's gargantuan pizzas.

The subject carries the two items outside, and in a fit of gluttony, drunkenness and shame, wraps the jumbo slice of pizza around the cheesesteak, and shovels the sickening combination down its throat like a snake swallowing a helpless mole.

But like a river in the deep, dry desert, it is but an illusion. For when the feeling is gone, and the day is new, your life-changing accomplishment sends you spiraling back to Earth with a long, long lecture - courtesy of the porcelain god.

Only those who truly with to live their lives to the fullest will experience this miraculous disaster. It will change your life.

01/24/09

Eh

by dumbjaw

Often undercooked. Often overhyped. It's okay if you're wasted and need something in your belly. Otherwise, avoid.

• Pros: Location
• Cons: Taste

09/28/08

NOT BAD IF U R DRUNK

by NegroWhippah

AND TO CORRECT MISTAH "PHILLY FOOD CRITIC" DIS AIN'T DA SAME THING AS LAZARO'S ... AT ALL!!!

LAZARO'S IS GOOD SOBER AND DRUNK.. LORENZO'S FAIR SOBER AND AMAZING DRUNK...

DA SERVICE IS LEGENDARY AND U CAN MAKE SOME GOOD CONVERSATION IN LINE WHILE WAITING.. A WORD 2 DA WISE SLASH HIP...

DO URSELF A FAVAH AND ONLY GET IT BY DA SLICE AS DA ENTIRE PIES AREN'T AS GOOD..

YO I KNOW DA SECRET RECIPE BY DA WAY... AND NOT TELLIN YO :-)

• Pros: GOO SLICES, INTERESTING PEEOPLE
• Cons: DA LINE ON WEEKENDS, A REHEATED SLICE